I have recently returned from a trip back to the UK – my first time back since I moved here, eighteen months ago. It was interesting to see what changes I noticed since leaving the UK and traveling from Grenada.
Sadly, the first thing I noticed was the brash, unfriendliness of the staff at Gatwick train station as they reluctantly helped newly arriving air passengers navigate the ticket machines. After we had had little sleep on a night flight, the cold briskness and frustrated sighs of the staff felt a stark contrast to the friendly, welcoming customer service that I have grown used to in Grenada. It brought tears to my eyes as I watched an elderly Grenadian man on his own struggling to work out where he needed to go and how to use the ticket machine. It seemed as if the vast, impersonal station added to his sense of isolation, knowing the small, friendly island that he had just left behind. It reminded me of those Grenadians who accepted the invitation to come to the ‘Mother Country’ in the 1950’s and 60’s and who were greeted with harsh cold winters and equally cold welcomes. Having lived in Grenada for a little while, it has made me more aware of the culture shock that they must have experienced, despite their excitement to experience the big cities and the new opportunities.
There have been a few things that have changed in the UK since I left, particularly on the roads. I have got used to quiet, country roads and so I was grateful that I didn't have to drive as I experienced multiple cars swerving in and out of lanes at high speed and huge lorries driving alongside us. We faced complicated motorway junctions that my daughter confidently navigated, despite still being a learner driver when I left the UK! There are definitely more takeaway delivery bikes whizzing around the cities and the cars seem to have got a lot quieter with more electric cars on the roads. In contrast to the cars that seem to silently creep up on me, the planes seem to have got louder. Depending on where I was in the UK, the planes were very thunderous and low as they flew overhead which made me thankful that I only have small light aircraft flying over my Grenadian home. I also missed the lively birdsong and the sound of the sea which I’ve got used to enjoying here.
The trip definitely felt like I was on holiday in the UK rather than coming back home and so I enjoyed being in familiar places and appreciating things I used to take for granted, seeing my former home with fresh eyes. I stayed in six different places and it was wonderful catching up with so many friends and having quality time with family.
When people who live in Grenada talk about going back to the UK, the first thing they usually say is that they are looking forward to British fish and chips and an Indian takeaway and these were high on my agenda too! Changes I noticed included some restaurants now having menus for dogs and others requiring us to scan a QR code to order online, despite waiting staff standing nearby. The other main thing I noticed is the abundance and choice in the shops and, having never really enjoyed shopping much in the past, I discovered the sense of retail satisfaction after getting everything on my list. I enjoyed packing up a small pallet of items for the house which I look forward to seeing again when they arrive at the port in a few weeks' time. I even found visiting a small supermarket exciting when I first arrived, seeing the wide range of food available. However, I noticed that the prices have increased there since I’ve been away. So, although groceries are still more expensive in Grenada, I realized that I was comparing Grenadian prices to old British prices without realizing how much the cost of living has increased in the UK.
I enjoyed the novelty of visiting large cities such as Leeds, Birmingham, Manchester and London. However, I noticed the increase in the number of people living on the streets and also the dirt, pollution and cigarette smoke in the air. I was also struck, sometimes physically, by the number of people walking at high speed whilst engrossed on their phone and oblivious to their surroundings. The impersonal immensity of city life and even the intentional blanking of passers-by on suburban pavements was a stark contrast to the friendly Grenadian greetings I have become accustomed to in my local area. I was aware of this when I was queueing at the infamous Beigel shop in East London’s Brick Lane. I could hear the conversations in front and behind me and I had to stop myself from joining in as this would not be as socially accepted as it is in Grenada. On a bridge, just before the Beigel shop, I saw a recent piece of Banksy artwork depicting three monkeys. This was one of thousands of graffiti art that decorated this colourful part of London, and the creativity of city graffiti and wall murals was something I appreciated in the cities I visited.
When I first arrived, I had a 5-hour coach trip from London to Manchester and it was a good opportunity to soak in the British countryside. I noticed sheep free to roam in fields instead of tied to bushes and when I saw my first old, broad oak tree surrounded by a flock of sheep in the centre of a field, I had to stop myself from rushing to take a photo! I’ve really valued walking in English woodland and reconnecting with oaks, beech and holly trees. Towards the end of my stay, it was lovely to see the trees beginning to turn to their Autumnal colours and to watch squirrels scurrying after acorns and conkers.
Of course, the main difference I noticed was in the weather and I really appreciated rainy, cold days in a new way, after the heat of the Caribbean. I remember my son saying that in Grenada it was as if someone had turned up the brightness whereas I experienced the reverse in the UK, with the sun not seeming as bright even on a sunny day and often the skies were grey. However, I experienced some lovely warm weather and we had plenty of walks along canals and in woods. Sadly, the British weather did its usual thing on August bank holiday and poured with rain on the day that we had planned a picnic to meet up with friends and family. Thankfully we were offered a church hall as a last-minute alternative and I enjoyed writing a quiz on Grenada. This was a fun way for people to learn some facts about where I live and even some Grenadian family members said that they had learnt something new!
Holidays are an opportunity to have a break from the routine and to gain some fresh energy and focus to return to daily life. I have found that my UK break has given me a fresh enthusiasm to complete the work on the house so that I can move onto the next phase of welcoming guests onto retreats. I also had the chance to meet people that previously I had only seen before on zoom and so it was interesting how perceptions alter when you see a person’s full form instead of just their head and shoulders! I really enjoyed the closeness of physically being in the same room with family and friends instead of seeing them on video calls and being able to hug people and my dog. Despite the wonders of technology that have enabled close relationships to be maintained over the miles, there is no substitute for sharing a physical space or being able to walk together to enable deeper conversations to enfold.
I close with some words from a daily meditation that I read whilst away. After my own retreat from developing a retreat house, being able to enjoy the British countryside, good food and special relationships, I can return to my home and the work at hand and say a ‘holy, undeniable Yes’ to life!
Dear friends,
ask the hard questions.
Give thanks for uncertainty.
Trust yourself.
Lean into the wisdom of community.
Don’t take yourself too seriously.
Know that the arc is long.
Lean on the ancestors.
Ask the creatures for advice.
Follow the wind.
Know that there is no right way.
Trust others on their path.
Find yours.
Embrace the mess.
Give your life to a holy, undeniable “Yes!”
Whatever that yes may be.
And know, that this “had to happen.”
How lucky we are to be alive! (Lydia Wylie-Kellermann).
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